Over the last few weeks, I’ve learned, observed, and shared examples of microaggressions. I’ve also learned about personal biases as well as institutional prejudices, oppression, and that anyone can encounter these incidents of inequality.
I can remember an incident where witnessed one of my family members become a target of bias, prejudice, and oppression. It was Saturday night and we were all at a church basketball game. During the last quarter, a fight broke out because one of the players felt the referee didn’t call the right call. Surprisingly, the fight escalated as quickly as it started. My cousins and aunt were already heading outside when someone yelled, “He’s got a gun!”
Shortly after leaving the gym, they decided to wait for my cousin’s girlfriend. As my aunt and her three younger sons were waiting in the car, the police pull up behind the car, rush up and slam my cousin to the car. In a frightened tone, my aunt quickly came out of the car and asked “What are y’all doing?!” My cousin answered, “It’s okay, mom.” My aunt replied, “No, it’s not! Take your hands off of my child!” As the police then told her to get back in the car, she said, “No! Get off my son! He didn’t do anything wrong!” The police, then, explained that they were responding to the call of a person carrying a gun in the area. The police continued to pat down my cousin and asked if he had a weapon on him. My cousin said, “No, “I don’t have anything except my Bible.” Then the police stood him up, questioned him, then left.
This specific incident put a bad taste in my mouth. I was lead to believe that the police was put in place to PROTECT and SERVE. I understand that they were doing their “job” but you went about it all wrong. This kind of bias and prejudice shown in this incident was, there was a black young man in the vicinity of where you got the call about a young man with a gun. My cousin wasn’t running, nor did he resist the police. He was waiting for someone and had his hand on the door with my aunt and three cousins in the car waiting as well. I was overwhelmed with so many emotions and feelings that I wasn’t able to process what I had just happened. Feelings of being scared, speechless, being afraid that my cousin was going to get aressted, and my aunt may have been tazed or arressted herself for misorderaly conduct. Who was going to drive us home? Why are the targetting us?
This incident could’ve gone a different way, where it could’ve been an opportunity for greater equity. Equity is the sence that “treatment that is fair and just, taking into account the capacities of individuals, while not dscriminating because of racial identity” in this case (Derman-Sparks, L., & Edwards, J. O., 2010, xii) . The police officers could’ve approached my family in a just manner. The police could’ve asked questions about why there were there or what they were doing. The Bible says, “Ask! And it should be given you; seek and ye shall find; knock, and the door shall be opened unto you; For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh. findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be open” (Matthew 7:7-8). If the police officers had asked, instead of insinuating that my cousin was the perp – my aunt wouldn’t have had to come out of the car and the conversation wouldn’t have been considered aggressive.
References:
Derman-Sparks, L., & Edwards, J. O. (2010). Anti-bias education for young children and ourselves. Washington, DC: National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC), p. xii
The Bible, Matthew 7:7,8
Bridging the Gap in Early Childhood Education 
Allison,
I can not imagine how terrifying that had to be for all parties of your family involved. In light of everything that is currently going on in the world with law enforcement I firmly believe there needs to be a major change in the way our law enforcement approach situations they are called to serve. It is a tricky situation because as it seems of late instead of fully assessing the situation upon arrival it appears they react before analyzing. This sort of behavior has left many that I know including myself wary of what ramifications if any will be implemented to create a balance with the type of situation your family encountered. I am sorry you all had to endure that and I sincerely hope that it has not brand an invisible yet ever present emotional scar for any of you. Thank you so much for sharing.
Violanda –
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Yes. It’s a difficult pill to swallow but we have to press on.
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Allison,
I am sorry this happened to your cousin. This is a description of something our people see way too often. I live in the metro Atlanta area, so this is an intense topic that is being discussed with my friends and family, considering recent situation. I truly feel like something must be done amongst our law enforcement. We need them for protection, however as of lately it is seeming that we need protection from them. It puts us in a hard situation and I am finding myself having to explain to my daughters that they do not have to be afraid of the police, then when we turn on the television the actions of the police are telling them the opposite. I pray that your cousin and your family overcome the feelings that you all felt, I pray for all African Americans, I pray for our world. Right now, the world is a scary place.
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Tamekia, I can imagine how you feel for your daughters. I have two sons and it seems hard enough for me as well. I just want them to see 80, whether mommy is alive or not. It’s hard living within these parameters
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Allison,
While I can only imagine what was going through your cousin’s head at the time all of this was going on. And you are right as children we are always told that Police are there to protect and serve. Now what I can say is not all Police are bad people, I have a God Brother who is apart of the police forces and he has never done that to anyone unless he was forced to do so. Your post broke my heart because instead of them asking questions first, they assume the worst. If it really was a gun, how do they know it was him who had it. It could have been anybody since you all were at a public event, again your cousin did right by not resisting and busting their bubbles when they found out it was no gun. Don’t think negatively about all cops, it just the ones who take their badge to the heart and want to harm others.
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You’re correct! However, I do not think negatively about all cops. They are doing their job to “protect and serve”. However, we as citizens need to also do our job by not giving them a reason to treat us this way. It may not happen all the time but we have to try as well. We have the right to remain SILENT and a right not to but we also need to be smart about how we handle certain situations.
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I bet a lot of the death could have been avoided if they would have acted the way you cousin did instead of like you said giving the cops a reason To react the way that they did. So in a sense we all play a part
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